a man and a looooong time

have a great week everyone

2009-11-08T22:34:58+01:00

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night time puter prayer :)

2009-11-08T22:30:26+01:00

Every single evening
As I'm lying here in bed,
This tiny little Prayer
Keeps running through my head:

God bless all my family
Wherever they may be,
Keep them warm
And safe from harm
For they're so close to me.

And God, there is one more thing
I wish that you could do;
Hope you don't mind me asking,
Please bless my computer too.

Now I know that it's unusual
To Bless a motherboard,
But listen just a second
While I explain it to you, Lord.

You see, that little metal box
Holds more than odds and ends;
Inside those small compartments
Rest so many of my friends.

I know so much about them
By the kindness that they give,
And this little scrap of metal
Takes me in to where they live.

By faith is how I know them
Much the same as you.
We share in what life brings us
And from that our friendships grew.

Please take an extra minute
From your duties up above,
To bless those in my address book
That's filled with so much love.

When you update your Heavenly list
On your own Great CD-ROM,
Bless everyone who says this prayer
Sent up to GOD..Com

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this guy has me in stitches :))

2009-11-08T22:28:19+01:00

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car boots, confessions and cartoons, what a day!

2009-11-08T22:26:39+01:00

Is it just me or is the weather weirder by the day? I got up this morning bright and breezy and ready to head off to a car boot and just as we was ready to leave the house the rain started to drizzle by the time we got to the boot it was pouring down blergh it was ok though as most of the car boot was inside so we had a nice mooch around even though it was a bit busy and squashed up in there I think everyone had the same idea to go to an indoor car boot. We went to the local market later and then headed home after unpacking the car with our boot treasures we sat down to have some lunch and as we sat down out came the sun Grrrrr its as though it was waiting for us to get back in the house! I wouldnt mind but we were all totally drenched not just because of the rain but because Belle has discovered the new game of Jumping in puddles so of course we kind of have an upside down shower while we are walking with her.
It was a great day though the car boot was full of stuff we grabbed a few cheap DVDs and even managed to buy a cheap christmas tree I know It is a while away and we normally have a real tree but we wanted to grab it as it seemed like a good deal as it was only £8 for a 5 foot tree with lights a bargain under any circumstances hehe there was nothing much at the market but saying that it was blumming freezing and damp and wet so I guess that put alot of people off I do however have a confession though I know that today is rememberance day and all about the 2 minutes silence etc but we just arrived at the market and it was one of the first times that belle wasnt in her push chair I was hobbling around on my stick and belle was walking for a change so we was wondering around the market when all of a sudden we heard the chimes of big ben on the radio and everyone stopped dead for the two minutes silence of course that was the moment that belle decided to run off!! I yelled "BELLE" at the top of my voice just as I realised that it was time for the two minutes silence everyone glared at me thankfully Jen was quicker on her feet than me and grabbed belle before she managed to get too far and then we stood there for the rest of the silenece but I felt so bad and I felt like everyone was looking at me for being so rude and disrespectful thankfully we had finished mooching by then so we got in the car and headed home
We had a chilled out afternoon watching some cartoons we watched the tinkerbelle movie with Belle and then we popped family guy on for an hour or so before I made some pizza and chips for tea a real sunday lunch, I am just trying to use up some of the stuff out of the freezer because we have a lot of new stuff coming from asda on tuesday to restock it.
Well I better wrap this up as Jen is working tomorrow so I have to be up at silly oclock. So dear reader its time to bid you a fair goodnight and wish you well for the week ahead I hope you have a good one.
Enjoy

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now I have seen everything :)

2009-11-07T21:43:08+01:00

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cruising :)

2009-11-07T21:40:57+01:00

Two elderly women were out driving in a large car.
Both could barely see over the dashboard.
As they were cruising along, they came to an intersection.
As they did the stoplight was red but they just went on through.
The woman in the passenger seat thought to herself, "I must be losing it I
could have sworn we just went through red light."
After a few more minutes they came to another intersection, the light was
red, and again they went right through.
This time, the passenger was almost sure that the light had been red, but
was also concerned that she might be seeing things.
She was getting nervous and decided to pay close attention.
At the next intersection, sure enough, the light was definitely red and
they blew right through it.
She turned to the other woman and said, "Mildred! Did you know that you
ran through three red lights in a row? You could have killed us!"
Mildred turned to her and said, "Oh Shit..! Am I driving..?"

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I think it has arrived

2009-11-07T21:38:28+01:00

is winter here? Cos it is sure as heck starting to feel that way my little tootsies havent warmed up all day long even with the blummin heat on mind you walking around a field in the damp grass didnt help too much I guess but it was a good car boot I got a couple of small rock cakes and some fairy cakes for belle I also got a wonderful musical christmas card for belle she lovely little musical things hmm well she is a kid and basically loves anything that makes a noise hehe so I think she will enjoy that. we got some lovely kiddy books for belle too she is getting really into reading lately hmm well looking at pictures in books anyway
The weather has been fine today though apart from the chill in the air it has been a kinda quiet one though other than the car boot we did see my aunt breifly she popped round to say hello as we havent had time to see her really even though she lives just down the road but with Jen being at work all day for most of the week and us catching up with the shopping etc for the rest of it we just havent had a chance to meet. My aunt thinks the world of Belle and I swear she would suffer withdrawl symptoms if she didnt see her.
I will probably go to bed in a bit as there seems to be nothing at all on TV worth watching all I can say is thank god for Our DVD collection I am slowly working my way through the sets of the simpsons and family guy with the occational movie thrown in here and there it keeps us out of trouble and we have to have something to break up the marathon sessions of in the night garden and Mr Maker that belle watches on Cbeebies
Hope you are all haveing a wonderful weekend and you have a fantastical sunday.
Enjoy

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meme time again

2009-11-07T13:54:23+01:00

1. With Friday the 13th on the horizon, do you have any superstitions?
Just friday the 13th as I have to go to the hospital for a checkup

2. Have you any phobias?
Spiders!

3. Do you believe in ghosts?
Yep I am sure that I have seen some only out the corner of my eye but you never know

4. Do you believe in UFO's?
Yep if we are the only intelligent life in the cosmos then thats an awfully big waste of space

5. If you could reincarnate, what would you come back as?
a butterfly

6. Do you believe in past lives?
Yep I would love to be regressed to see who I once was .

7. Have you a lucky number?
Yes, 5

8. Have you ever had your fortune told?
Yep by tarot cards and a medium.

9. Do you believe in Karma?
Yep I hope that if you give bad karma then you get what you deserve.

10. Has conventional religion had it's day?
I have never been into religion I am more spiritual.

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time for bed gnight all :)

2009-11-06T22:31:10+01:00

nighty night folk hope you have a great night

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Zombie Baby Strikes again!

2009-11-06T22:15:52+01:00

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my fave sesame street anim

2009-11-06T22:10:48+01:00

Thank you sesame street for all the memories

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friday funny

2009-11-06T22:08:47+01:00

A Muslim was sitting next to Paddy on a plane. Paddy ordered a whiskey.

The stewardess asked the Muslim if he'd like a drink.

He replied in disgust "I'd rather be raped by a dozen whores than let liquor touch my lips!"

Paddy handed his drink back and said "Me too, I didn't know we had a choice!"

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friday fumblings :)

2009-11-06T22:07:36+01:00

Its Fridaaaaaaay woo hooo whack my wobblies and wet a welly if it isnt the start of the weekend already what a week all in all not bad a few ups and downs but the ups outweigh the downs so thats gotta be a good thing right? today has been a short but kinda busy day I am not really sure what I have done that was busy but I seem to have been pretty busy we got up Jen nipped to the post office and when she came back we went to iceland in redditch to grab a couple of things for the freezer then we popped into aldis and pound stretcher before coming home dont ever let it be said that I dont know how to enjoy a friday or show my wife a good time hehe. we had a great dinner tonight though Jen said she was gonna make a chicken korma but when she opened the jar it was full of onions which neither Jen or I can have as we are allergic to them in a nether region sort of way (PARP!) so we ended up with sweet and sour chicken instead which was scrummy and some naan breads too deliciouso. I managed to get all my dads xmas pressies wrapped up today I know that sounds like I brought a load of stuff but I got him some slippers and a snuggie and some choccy and the obligitory bottle of booze. probably enough to fill a decent size carrier bag. I never know if I overdo christmas I know that alot of people only give one or two pressies but I always go a little crazy and over the top maybe I am a little like scrooge in reverse I dunno I always think xmas is a magic time of year and thats why I look forward to it and just overdo things blergh Im rambling arent I
I honestly dont know what else has been going on today apart from finding out ;thanks to sparkles101 that today is sesame streets 40th birthday god that makes me feel old I remember the show I remember watching it and in awe of the animations and songs on it. Im gonna post my fave on here later so keep them peeled hehe.
We are off to the car boots tomorrow to find some bargains and maybe get a antiques roadshow heirloom for 50p or so hmmm well a guy can dream cant he? Just hope the weather is better as there is nothing worse than walking around a field in the middle of nowhere when it is pouring with rain
Hope you have a wonderful weekend whatever you are upto
Enjoy

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Friday Five - autumn

2009-11-06T11:30:42+01:00

1. Do you have a favourite part of autumn?
Just going for a walk in the leaves the trees have dropped I just love autumn its the best time of year

2. "It's too cold to snow!" Do you think it ever is?
I dont think it is ever too cold to snow but then again I guess if its too cold then it would be hail hurling out of the sky

3. Do you feel there is still a place for British Summer Time or should we just stop changing the clocks?
Nope I think we should stop buggering about with the clocks it messes up our body clocks and just depresses us all the more

4. Are there certain meals you only eat in certain seasons (salad in summer, stew in winter)?
Nah we have stew in the summer as Jen loves the stuff and salad in the winter as it is a cheap meal or a cheap side dish Grub is grub

5. Autumn is...?
The Rainbow Season with all the different colours of leaves etc etc

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tonights tiny titter

2009-11-05T22:35:46+01:00

Q. What's a Catholic priest and a pint of Guiness got in common?

A. A black coat, white collar and you've got to watch your arse if you get a dodgy one!

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cell phone Karma part 2 :)

2009-11-05T22:33:43+01:00

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there has to be another way?

2009-11-05T22:32:41+01:00

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another weird and wonderful day from my life

2009-11-05T22:31:03+01:00

Its been a long but weird day today It started off strange as we got to have a lie in this morning as Jen wasnt going to work its a bit bizarre as we started to get into the swing of getting up early hmmm well ok then I started to get into the swing of getting up early I think Jen and Belle were starting to miss thier lie ins. But today I had woke up at the usual silly oclock however so I didnt disturb anyone I just lay in bed and tried to get back to sleep but just as my body started to give up conciousness I was just about to doze off into my dreamland and then suddenly I was ripped from my dive into the land of sleep by someone giving my knocker a damn good banging and no it isnt some dreadful double entendre meaning that Jen was feeling frisky far from it I am afraid it was the door knocked being wrapped loudly as he had some packages for me which were the last few presents for belle xmas sack. Of course that was the end of the lie in so we got up and got little belle up to make sure she was feeling better it seemed like the lie in did her the world of good as she has been up to her usual tricks all day long climbing over us jumping on us and basically just causing mischeif
We decided we would do something very exciting yes of course I am talking about a trip to the TIP we certainly know how to enjoy life dont we hehe but it isnt as bad as it sounds. We had alot of boxes to get rid of as we had the printer box and various other packages that have been delivered which lumbered us with loads of cardboard and packing materials which was starting to take over our spare room. So we lobbed it all into the car and headed off we dumped it all and then popped into the little charity shop that is based in the tip it is really quite good it has shelves and shelves of second hand books, games and just general bric a brac it is like a little treasure trove you never know what you will find we even saw an old Organ there today I asked Jen if she wanted a go and practice on an organ as she might be out of practice but she doesnt seem to appreciate my sense of humour heheee we got some books and then headed off to tescos to get a few bits and bobs to spend the vouchers that came through the post. we spent it on getting belle some more trousers etc then it was back home to chill out for the rest of the night sitting here listening to the fireworks going off around the place, we didnt go to one yet but there is one on ssaturday so we might go and see what they have to offer I just hope that Belle is old enough to enjoy it and it doesnt scare her too much
I hope you have had a great day and you have an even better one tomorrow
Enjoy

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midweek mellow mirth

2009-11-04T22:09:05+01:00

Paddy and his wife are lying in bed and the neighbours' dog is barking like mad in the garden. Paddy says "To hell with this!" and storms off.

He comes back upstairs 5 minutes later and his wife asks "What did you do ?"

Paddy replies "I've put the dog in our garden. Let's see how they like it!"

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If only this was real

2009-11-04T22:06:44+01:00

If only this were real -

how often do you wish this would happen to those smug people on the phone

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Jens boyfriend strikes again

2009-11-04T22:04:45+01:00

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at last I have done it!!

2009-11-04T22:02:31+01:00

Yes its true folks I finally managed to do what I have been promising myself I would do all week. I got the printer working at long last its been a heck of a day as usual took Jen to work and then got back to make belles brekkie before ringing my aunt up to make sure that she was ready to go to the market I met up with her and we headed off got some sausage rolls and fresh crusty bread and some fruit and headed back home Belle was enjoying herself pushing her own pushchair around and exploring the gardens on the way back. But when she got back she suddenly went quiet and didnt seem herself at all I put it down to being a little tired still from being up early again for the third day on the trot. But as the day went on she became more and more quiet just lieing on the sofa hugging her teddies rather than running around like a loon. I put her down for a nap and she went out like a light I was sure that would let her catch up on her sleep but when i got her up at 3 to go and pick Jen up she was even worse. the poor little might was tearful and withdrawn even when we got back from picking up Jen she just flaked out on the sofa again I made a quick tea of pizza and chips which is one of her faves but she wouldnt eat it but then she was really sick thankfully after that she came back a little bit more herself so much so we decided to give her a lovely bath her favourite thing to do and she had a bath and then we popped her in bed with her teddies and all and fingers crossed she will be ok tomorrow but it really upsets me I mean I have only been in charge of looking after her for 3 days and she is already sick blergh!.
I am glad that I managed to get the printer installed today working on both puters mine and Jens so that is a good thing I managed to get the washing done too so I am upto date with everything so tomorrow will be a relaxation day for myself and jen who is totally shattered after the last three days. I just hope that Little belle will be feeling ok too I hate it when one of my girls is poorly
Hope you have had a better day.
Enjoy

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wizard of oz horror!!!!

2009-11-03T22:37:06+01:00

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quick titter before bed :)

2009-11-03T22:35:37+01:00

Paddy and Murphy are working on a building site.
Paddy says to Murphy "I'm gonna have the day off, I'm gonna pretend I'm mad!"
He climbs up the rafters , hangs upside down and shouts "I'M A LIGHTBULB!
I'M A LIGHTBULB!" Murphy watches in amazement!
The Foreman shouts "Paddy you're mad, go home" So he leaves the site.
Murphy starts packing his kit up to leave as well.
"Where the hell are you going?" asks the Foreman.
"I can't work in the friggin' dark!" says Murphy.

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a note from Mr Freeze - brrrrrr

2009-11-03T22:33:01+01:00

Blimey I dont know what the flip is wrong with me today I am blummin freezing all day long I was up early as usual we got belle up at 7 to get her dressed so we could drop Jen off but little belle wasnt too happy about being woken up for the second day on the trot so early in the morning the first time was great fun but today the novelty wore off and she was a little teary and grumpy for most of the day however when we got back from dropping Jen off and she had some toast and was watching mr maker on TV she was fine although she still looked a little tired so I thought she would have a nice nap I put her down at 1 but would she nap?? oooooh no she threw her toys around the room, screamed and yelled and jumped all over her bed but wouldnt nap I gave up at 2 and brought her back down to watch some TV while I was tidying up I made Jen a cup of tea in a travel mug as she forgot to take one with her this morning so I thought it would be a nice surprise to leave work to one. I got belle in the car and we set off to pick Jen up I got to the end of the road and checked on belle in the rear view mirror and she was fast asleep! DOH!
Anyhow back to the chill of the day I have been freezeing all day I dont know why as the house wasnt cold Belle was nice and toasty and Jen said she wasnt cold etc etc but I have been as cold as a penguins plonker all day long my feet have been like blocks of ice all day so I wont be up much longer today I am off to kip in a moment to get under the blankets and warm up hopefully might even take some lemsip... after all it might be MANFLU!!!! and we all know how disasterous that would be for the planet as a whole Jen just says I am missing her and suffering withdrawl symptoms hehe she has had a long day today they left her on her own all day long and she has hardly had a break all day so she said it has felt like a really long day. Thankfully its her last working day of the week tomorrow so we can have a little lie in on thursday hmm well hopefully we can if belle manages to catch up on her sleep too. I just hope that the rain stays away too so we can have a little daylight rather than be swamped with these darn rain clouds. Hope you have had a great day and I hope you have a great wednesday too
Enjoy

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especially for Jen as she fancies him!

2009-11-03T22:30:17+01:00

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new sperm banks?

2009-11-02T23:00:30+01:00

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storys with morals

2009-11-02T22:56:34+01:00

A teacher gave her class of 11 year olds an assignment: To get their parent to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it.

The next day the kids came back and one by one began to tell their stories.

Ashley said, 'My father's a farmer and we have a lot of egg-laying hens. One time we were taking our eggs to market in a basket on the front seat of the car when we hit a big bump in the road and all the eggs got broken.'

'What's the morale of that story?' asked the teacher.

'Don't put all your eggs in one basket!'

'Very good,' said the teacher.

Next little Sarah raised her hand and said, 'Our family are farmers too. But we raise chickens for the meat market. One day we had a dozen eggs, but when they hatched we only got ten live chicks, and the moral to this story is, 'Don't count your chickens before they're hatched'.'

'That was a fine story Sarah.'

Michael, do you have a story to share?'
'Yes. My daddy told me this story about my Auntie Sharon.
Auntie Sharon was a flight engineer on a plane in the Gulf War and her plane got hit.

She had to bail out over enemy territory and all she had was a bottle of whisky, a machine gun and a machete.
She drank the whiskey on the way down so it wouldn't break and then she landed right in the middle of 100 enemy troops.
She killed seventy of them with the machine gun until she Ran out of bullets.
Then she killed twenty more with the machete until the blade broke.
Then she killed the last ten with her bare hands.'

'Good heavens,' said the horrified teacher, 'what kind of moral did your daddy tell you from that horrible story?'

'Stay the f*ck away from Auntie Sharon when she's been drinking’

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Time for revenge on the telemarketers and junk mail

2009-11-02T22:51:16+01:00

Want to know how to get revenge on the spammers, and telemarketers, then read on -

(1) The three little words: 'Hold On, Please...'
Saying this, while putting down your phone and walking off ( instead of hanging-up immediately) would make each telemarketing call so much more time-consuming that boiler room sales would grind to a halt.

Then when you eventually hear BT's 'beep-beep-beep' tone, you know it's time to go back and hang up your handset . you have efficiently completed your task.

These three little words could help eliminate telephone soliciting.

(2) Do you ever get those annoying phone calls with no one on the other end?

This is a telemarketing technique where a machine makes phone calls and records the time of day when a person answers the phone.

This technique is then used to determine the best time of day for a 'real' salesperson to call back and get someone at home.

What you can do after answering: If you notice there is no one there, is to immediately start hitting your # button on the phone, 6 or 7 times, as quickly as possible. This confuses the machine that dialled the call and it kicks your number out of their system. Gosh, what a shame not to have your name in their system any longer!!!

3: When you get those 'pre-approved' letters in the mail for everything from credit cards to 2nd mortgages and similar type junk, do not throw away the return envelope.

Most of these come with postage-prepaid return envelopes, right?

It costs them more than the regular postage 'IF' and when they are returned. It costs them nothing if you throw them away! In that case, why not get rid of some of your other junk mail and put it in these cool little, postage-prepaid return envelopes.

Send an advert for your local chimney sweeper to American Express ... they might need one!
Send a pizza coupon to HSBC ... in case their canteen packs up. You get the idea.

If you didn't get anything else that day, then just send them back their blank application form ... after all, it is their form!

If you want to remain anonymous, just make sure your name isn't on anything you return.

You can even send the envelope back empty if you want to just to keep them guessing! It still costs them, and it is their envelope after all ... you are just returning it!!!!

The banks and credit card companies are currently getting a lot of their own junk back in the post, but folks ... we need to OVERWHELM them, in order to stop them.

Let's let them know what it's like to get lots of junk mail, and best of all they're paying for it ... Twice!

Let's help keep Royal Mail busy. Since the Royal Mail are saying that e-mail is cutting into their business profits, let's help them so they will not need to increase postage costs again. You get the idea!

If enough people follow these tips, it will work ---- maybe you'll get very little junk mail anymore.

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Monumental Monday Mayhem!

2009-11-02T22:48:53+01:00

Wowsers what a day its been hectic to say the least We was up this morning before it was light so Jen could get ready for her first full day of work, we got belle up and had breakfast, then set off by 7.25 as we was unsure what the traffic would be like with the schools back etc however we still arrived by 7.40? dont know how as it is a good 25 minute journey but saying that after I dropped Jen off I got back for 8 again I dont know how. As I was obeying the speed limits etc (honest officers) I got back and there on the doormat was a letter from the postman saying that he came at 7.35 and had 7 packages to deliver soI would have to pick them up from the delivery office so I waited around until 9.30 so that the rush hour would be definitely over. I got belle back in the car and we headed off I got to the post office and the lady brought a royal mail postage sack out for me and told me to take the bag too so it was lobbed into the car and we headed back home to get the laundry done and to tidy around a little. Checking the phone when I returned I discovered my aunt had rang up just for a chat I will ring her tomorrow I just don’t have the time I am sooo behind with my plots and plans for the day. I settle down into my duties when the phone rings I think it might be my aunt again so I answer it is a guy from the DVLA saying that I should ignore the letter telling me that I have a driving test on the 31st December?!?! I have no such letter he says well when you get it just ignore it as My test is actually on the 18th I thank him for his call and replace the receiver, then hear a knock at the door it is the postman delivering the aforementioned letter talk about timing!. Oh well back to the chores I put the first lot of laundry in the dryer and get the next load ready to pop in the machine. I look up at the noticeboard and remember to check out the flyer about the mother and toddler group that i have an appointment to go and see tomorrow at 11. I grab the flyer and there written on the top is appointment at 11am on the 2/11 ...... Hmmmm 2/11 ..... that sounds familiar! AAAAAAARRRRGH its today that belle has the appointment not tomorrow Its already 11.30! we drop everything Belle is bundled into the car again still munching her chocolate maltesters. I drive up onto the highstreet to find the daycare place which is down the side of the local chippy I head in and almost fall over the health visitor who I have the appointment with she is on her way out. “Im sooooo sorry” I blurt out and explain the misunderstanding she was very understanding and while belle played with the toys etc I had a chat to Gemma the health visitor she wanted to know if I was concerned about anything etc etc made sure that Belle could talk and walk and climb etc etc then she measured her and introduced me to a lady called Jane who gave us lots of info about other nurserys etc around the area. Then I was given a book bag by the health visitor before they started to wrap up the place for the day so we jumped back in the car to return to our dutiesI made some lunch which belle duely chomped before I put her down for a little nap at around 2pm which she sooo needed as she has been up all day earlier than she usually is. But then i had to wake her up again at 3 so she could get ready to go and pick mommy up at 3.30 we got there for 10 to four another shockingly quick scoot down the back roads I swear that I never broke one speed limit so I don’t know why I am getting there so quickly all of a sudden?!?! Jen comes out at 4.00 beaming like a Cheshire cat she has had a fantastic day and loves her job which is great but she is totally shattered now and so I drive her back home ready for her to have a little rest while I knock up a quick curry pie and noodles for tea followed by an apple strudel and custard yummmmm then its off to sleep for belle and I can finally sit down to rest holy moly what a day half the things I had planned for the day have fallen by the wayside including sorting out the printer, wrapping more pressies for xmas and other bits and bobs but hey ho tomorrow is another day and now I don’t have to take belle to the daycare group then I have a day of relaxation hopefully although saying that i might take her to another group thats just down the road as she loved today playing with the other kids etc I just hope its a little calmer than today
Heres hoping, Im off to kip in a minute to get some zzz's before tomorrows early morning
Hope you had a better day than me
Enjoy tomorrow

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