SICK JOKES
"Mommy, Mommy! Why are we pushing the car off the cliff?"
"Shut up, you'll wake your father."
"Mommy, Mommy! What's a nymphomaniac?"
"Shut up and help me get Gran off the doorknob."
"Mommy, Mommy! Why don't I have a big thing like Dad's between my legs?"
"You will when you get older, Lucy!"
"Mommy, Mommy! Are you sure this is how to learn to swim?"
"Shut up and get back in the sack."
"Mommy, Mommy! What's an Oedipus complex?"
"Shut up and kiss me."
"Mommy, Mommy! Why can't I play with the other kids?"
"Shut up and deal."
"Mommy, Mommy! Granpa's going out!"
"Well throw some more petrol on him then."
"Mommy, Mommy! What happened to all that dog food Fido wouldn't eat?"
"Shut up and eat your meat loaf."
"Mommy, Mommy! When are we going to have Aunt Edna for dinner?"
"Shut up, we haven't finished your Grandmother yet."
"Mommy, Mommy! Dad just poisoned my kitten!"
"Never mind dear. Perhaps he had to do it."
"No he didn't , he promised me I could!"
"Mommy, Mommy! What's a vampire?"
"Shut up and eat your soup before it clots."
"Mommy, Mommy! What's an orgasm?"
"I don't know dear, ask your father."
"Mommy, Mommy! Dad's running down the street!"
"Shut up and step on the accelerator!"
"Mommy, Mommy! Why do I have to hop everywhere?"
"Shut up or I'll chop off the other leg!"
"Mommy, Mommy! Can I war a bra now I'm 16?"
"Shut up, Albert."
"Mommy, Mommy! I don't want to see Niagra Falls!"
"Shut up and get back in the barrel!"
"Mommy, Mommy! I don't want to go to Australia."
"Shut up and keep swimming."
"Mommy, Mommy! What's a werewolf?"
"Shut up and comb your face."
"Mommy, Mommy! Why is my hair so slimy?"
"Shut up you little snot."
"Mommy, Mommy! I keep running in circles"
"Shut up or I'll nail your other foot to the floor."
"Mommy, Mommy! The milkman's here. Have you got the money or should I go out and play?"